By Tim Collin
Editor, Humor News Nuts Websites
Most people in Northern Michigan know how to make banana wine. There are literally millions of internet sites dedicate to making banana wine. However, most people in Northern Michigan learn how to make banana wine when they are only twelve or thirteen years old (in other words, the first time they go to jail). All you need is a cooked banana, just shy of a gallon of water, a cup of sugar and a package of yeast. Just mix it all together in a milk jug and ten days later it is time to party.
Regular Northern Michiganders call this “Happy Winter Wine”. Banana wine is a winter wine because there is nothing that grows in Michigan in the winter and bananas are about the only fruit that wage earners in Northern Michigan can afford.
Now ten day old wine is good for the fact that it does make people happy but it does not make them crazy. Only about one in four banana wine drinkers commits any type of felony while they are drinking. That is almost the same as coffee drinkers in Northern Michigan.
With all that is said above it is still best to give out a warning to all potential banana wine creators. This warning involves the banana itself that lies mostly on the tope of your banana wine milk jug. In short, don’t eat your banana. Eating your banana is very hazardous to your health
In the Journal of Mediocre At Best Medicine it has been reported that people who chew on and eat the banana they have in their banana wine, not only become uncontrollably intoxicated but, they suffer hallucinations not much different then eating magic mushrooms.
So, if you want to really experiment with the really bad stuff then go ahead, eat your banana and see what happens. But, at least be socially responsible. Don‘t share your banana with anyone else..